Clit Lit (Kinda)

[m31andy]

Fictionwise has brought me the news that they're offering a Valentine's Special on 15 individual Harlequin romances. Free. Gratis. Crikey.

Now I don't read Mills and Boon (the UK Harlequin label), but the temptation to get all of these is overwhelming. But what am I setting myself up for?

1 Once A Cowboy by Linda Warren

Brodie Hayes is a former rodeo star, now a rancher--a cowboy, through and through. But when he finds out some shocking news about the circumstances of his birth, he begins to question his identity. Luckily, private investigator Alexandra Donovan is there to help him find the truth about who he is. Along the way, he discovers that even a man who thought he'd be alone for the rest of his life can fall in love. For Brodie, love was something you did once--and for always. But is Alex the type of woman who can take on a stubborn man like him? Because there's one thing about him that will never change, no matter what they find out about his past--once a cowboy, always a cowboy.

2 Price of Passion by Susan Napier

Kate had learned certain lessons as Drake Daniels's lover: Lesson number one: the price of loving Drake was not to love him. Lesson number two: never give him what he expected. Discovering she was pregnant certainly fulfilled lesson number two. Drake had made it clear commitment and children were not on his menu. Now Kate must break her news. But when she sees Drake, passion kicks in, begging to be indulged again...just once!

3 The Bride's Baby by Liz Fielding

Events manager Sylvie Smith is organizing a glittering fund-raising event: a wedding show in a stately home. She has even been roped into pretending to be a bride...a bride who's five months pregnant! The bride everyone is talking about! It should be every girl's dream to design a wedding with no expense spared, but it's not Sylvie's. Longbourne Court was her ancestral home, and she's just discovered that the new owner is Tom McFarlane--her baby's secret father. Now Tom's standing in front of her, looking at her bump....

4 Dancing In the Moonlight by RaeAnne Thayne

Lieutenant Magdalena Cruz had come home?And though all she wanted was to be alone, infuriatingly handsome Dr. Jake Dalton--of the enemy Daltons--wouldn't cooperate. And she needed him to, because the walls around her heart were dangerously close to crumbling every time he came near.? Jake had spent most of his life trying to get closer to Maggie, with little to show for it. But she was the woman he'd always wanted, and no injury in the world could change that. Now if only he could convince her that the woman who stood before him was beautiful, desirable, whole?and meant to be his.?

5 Baby Bonanza by Maureen Child

Twins? The startling revelation that his affair with Jenna Baker had produced two little boys was almost impossible to grasp. Tycoon Nick Falco had never considered himself the settling-down type, yet now that fatherhood had been thrust upon him, he was determined to give his sons his name. But their mother wasn't about to let him back into her life ... at least not without those three little words Nick had never, ever said.

6 Hide In Plain Sight by Marta Perry

"Please God, if you're listening, keep Rachel safe." She couldn't turn her back on her family in their time of need. So when her sister was injured, financial expert Andrea Hampton traded the big city for Amish country to help turn her grandmother's house into an inn. But life with the Plain People took a treacherous turn when a string of accidents and pranks threatened her family. Someone didn't want the secrets the old house harbored to come to light. Trusting anyone--even the handsome carpenter who seemed so genuine--was a battle for Andrea, but her life depended on her ability to find the truth.

7 A Very Special Delivery by Linda Goodnight

It was the surprise of a lifetime for recluse Molly McCreight when single dad Ethan Hunter entrusted her with his infant daughter while he delivered medicine to an elderly man during an ice storm. Past experience had taught Molly how fragile life could be, but she was touched by this stranger's faith in her abilities. Once the storm had passed, though, and her guests returned home, normalcy eluded Molly. The Hunters' presence had brought much-needed joy to her quiet world, but their absence threatened to crush her forever. Still, was she ready to admit that this tiny family held the key to the future she'd always secretly craved?

8 Homespun Bride by Jillian Hart

Montana Territory in 1883 was a dangerous place--especially for a blind woman struggling to make her way through an early winter snowstorm. Undaunted, Noelle Kramer fought to remain independent. But then a runaway horse nearly plunged her into a rushing, ice-choked river, before a stranger's strong, sure hand saved her from certain death. And yet this was no stranger. Though she could not know it, her rescuer was rancher Thad McKaslin, the man who had once loved her more than life itself. Losing her had shaken all his most deeply held beliefs. Now he wondered if the return of this strong woman was a sign that somehow he could find his way home.

9 Crime Scene at Cardwell Ranch by B.J. Daniels

After Hudson Savage betrayed her, Dana Cardwell hoped never to lay eyes on the seductive cowboy again. Until a bunch of old bones showed up on her family ranch. Suddenly her former lover was back in her life in a big way--to investigate a decades-old crime. Five years ago, Hud left town with a heart load of regrets. But now, as acting interim marshal, he had a job to do. And this time he wasn't walking away. Because now Dana's life was on the line--as the unsuspecting target of a killer who still walked the canyon. Hud would do whatever it took to keep Dana close. Even if it meant risking his own heart for a second chance for both of them....

10 Snowbound by Janice Kay Johnson

When a blizzard strands Fiona MacPherson and her students in Oregon's Cascade Mountains, their only hope of survival is to seek shelter at Thunder Mountain Lodge. Their host is John Fallon, a handsome, enigmatic war veteran haunted by secrets and scars that may never heal. John Fallon never imagined he'd be playing host to this captivating teacher and her eight teenage charges. But when his solitude is shattered by their arrival, his world shifts on its axis. He needs Fiona--but does she need him? There's only one way to find out. The ex-soldier must find the courage to reach out to the remarkable woman who has transformed his life...

11 Irresistible Forces by Brenda Jackson

An offer he couldn't refuse... One week of mind-blowing sex on a beautiful Caribbean island. Of all the business proposals financial tycoon Dominic Saxon has heard, Taylor Steele's is definitely the most tempting. All Taylor wants in return is for Dominic to father her baby. No strings, no commitments?just a mutually satisfying arrangement. Make that very satisfying. For a man with no intention of marrying again, it sounds ideal. Taylor wants a baby, not a relationship. And sexy, intelligent Dominic seems like a man with perfect genes. Turns out, Dominic has perfect everything. Their ""procreation vacation"" is a whirlwind of sensual ecstasy. But when it's over, will either of them be able to say goodbye?

12 Kiss Me Deadly by Michele Hauf

Death cocktail is what the vampires call a witch's blood. It's poisonous--a drop will destroy a vampire within minutes. Nikolaus Drake is the rare vampire who has survived his first taste. Now he's on the hunt for the witch who almost brought him to his demise--Ravin Crosse. A witch who spends her nights hunting vampire tribes, Ravin has three obligations to fulfill to set her soul free. One of those obligations--crafting a love spell--twists her world upside down when Nikolaus draws the spell from her veins. Natural enemies rarely make the best bedfellows--but is it possible their intentions are really, truly the same? Can Nikolaus's tribal loyalty survive if he surrenders to desires far darker than his own?

13 Stranded With a Spy by Merline Lovelace

When Mallory Dawes, suddenly infamous in the States, decided to take that vacation to France, her problems were just beginning: a lost passport. A car swept out to sea. Missing travelers' checks. And a mysterious, if intriguing, man who always seemed to turn up just when she was in trouble... Cutter Smith--code name: Slash--was told to keep the beautiful blonde in his sights. But as his interest in her veered from the professional to the intensely personal, Cutter knew the cost of falling in love would be high indeed. And he would have to pay the price....

14 Slow Hands by Leslie Kelly

This is Maddy Turner's lucky day. The civilized society girl just bid on sexy rogue Jake Wallace at a charity bachelor auction--and won! But Maddy knows Jake's dirty little secret. And it should keep her from trying out her new boy toy. Too bad she can't stop herself from indulging in raw, quite uncivilized sex all the same.... Jake Wallace is utterly bewitched by Maddy--and utterly bewildered. How can this tantalizing woman melt so rapturously under his ministrations one moment, then turn into a haughty queen the next? He's determined to get to the bottom of Maddy's agenda. One slow, delicious inch at a time...

15 His Lady Mistress by Elizabeth Rolls

DOWNTRODDEN SERVANT OR GRACIOUS LADY? When Max, Earl Blakehurst, meets Verity he sees a downtrodden servant. He doesn't recognize her as the daughter of a colonel under whom he used to serve, the girl he'd once helped years before. The life Verity's now living is untenable. So he proposes a shocking solution--he will set her up as his mistress. It's only once that Verity's finally agreed, once Max is beginning to lose his heart to her, that he discovers her true identity. Max is taken aback; he would never have suggested this lady become his mistress. Now, to avoid scandal, they'll have to marry!

And as these are all different 'types' of Harlequin Romance, one of these is a Steeple Hill book. Yes, the Christian Inspirational Romance line, perpetrators of the only Harlequin book I own, Daddy's Home (Don't ask, you don't want to know) Guess which one is the sheep amongst the goats.

Also, one for mikes_grrl, methinks. Via oursin.

Literature writers turn to erotica.

Unfortunately, highly predictable. No wonder men complain that they can't work out what women actually want - we're not even honest with ourselves.